Matthew is 10, he is in 4th grade at a school of 850+ kids. He has had 25+ kids in his class every year that he has been in school. He is on a first name basis with the principal and vice principal of the school because he has gotten a lot of referral for misbehaving in his almost 5 years at the school.
This is the first year that a teacher has put her foot down and stated that there is something "wrong" with our son. He is not the same as other kids, and states that she thinks he has ADHD.
This is the first year he was referred to the school counselor (they have ONE for the whole school) and he has worked with him and made great strides in helping him. They first worked on social skills - how to make friends - with another group of kids that he works with they worked on interacting with each other - so now Matthew has a group of friends to play with at recess.
Then they moved on to a behavioral plan where each day there is a rating sheet that Matthew fills out on how he think his day went and then the teacher does the same & Matthew earns stickers that equal a trip to the treasure chest to get a prize. The behavior chart has worked well, but the counselor met with us just over a week ago and stated they have done about all they can to help him, further help would be necessary to help him succeed. You need to take him to the pediatrician to be evaluated for ADHD and get him some medicine.
Um... OK we thought - we will take him to the pediatrician but we are not agreeing to medicating him right away. We will see what she thinks...
We just recently had to fill out paperwork for the pediatrician to review in preparation for our evaluation next week. The teacher added a note that listed what she sees on a regular basis in class that are not good behaviors: "typical behaviors: talks during my instruction, has a hard time focusing and remaining on task, blurts out, goofs off, talks to students around him and distracts them by messing with the supply basket on the table. He does not finish his work, or takes much longer than the other students to do it. He has a hard time getting started and makes careless mistakes on assignments. His hands are on others during carpet time. Doesn't pay attention. Hums and makes extra noises, like rolling or tapping pencils. Talks in line, even after being reminded no to. Puts things in his mouth, such as pencils and magnets. I often have him work at the isolation desk, which helps. Even there, his hands are moving over the file cabinet and counter. Picks at other kids; for example: poking them, wiggling their desk, mimicking what they say, repeatedly pushing the recorder away from their mouth, and so forth. Gets in trouble often in the cafeteria or on the playground. Involved in fights. Has difficulty interacting appropriately with others his age. His behavior makes others prefer not to work or play with him. It also affects his academic success and the learning of others in the classroom."
(Wow that is a lot when I type it out like that - hard to read about your own child - and hard to think of what life is like for him, as he states that he doesn't know why he does what he does, and the counselor is sure that he doesn't mean to do any of it - that he truly feels out of control)
I have been grain free for almost six months. So I did some reading and my husband heard from some coworkers how elimination diets have worked for their children to help with ADHD symptoms. 9 days ago we talked to our son and asked him if he was willing to try going wheat free to help himself. He was on board & we did it we took him off wheat.
We have had to brainstorm a bunch to determine ideas for what he can take to school for lunch. Dinner has become a bit different around home, a few less choices because we haven't really stocked up on alternatives that he can have that match what Dad and sisters are having. But it doesn't matter. As it is working!
Matthew is happier, he feels more focused, he feels more in control of himself... Did I mention he feels happier? What more could a parent want?
It is a whole new atmosphere at home, it is calmer, quieter and just peaceful... We could get used to this. We are still struggling with his oldest sister nit-picking EVERYTHING he does, and he is very sensitive to this because he has worked hard at making improvements, yet she is still finding the bad in everything... I feel so bad for him when she does this and he ends up in his room feeling bad for himself that he can't do anything right in her eyes... :( But we are working on it.
Matthew's teacher has noticed a bit of difference, but I am pretty sure Matthew hasn't told her what we have changed. I kind of like it that way - as it would be interesting to see if they see improvements that they would expect if they think he started medication...
I am amazed that we are not getting any resistance from Matthew on this change - which tells me that he truly sees the difference in himself and he likes it... He tells me that he just feels better...
The cutest thing was last night when he admitted to having something at school that wasn't wheat-free... I inquired what it was and he stated "a cupcake - and it was delicious!" I told him "I bet it was..." Then we talked about how he felt after he had the cupcake - he said he could tell right away, that he lost focus again... And I pointed out that it could be why he was feeling extra tired too... I thanked him for letting me know about the slip-up, but it also helped us confirm that he may truly be intolerant to wheat...
Going to end this novel of a post for now, but leave you with a link that describes what ADHD is like for a child...
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